2 Much Too Busy Siesta

Exhaustion means that our vital energies are completely worn out and spent.  Spiritual exhaustion is never the result of sin, but of service.  Whether or not you experience exhaustion will depend on where you get your supplies.  Jesus said to Peter, “Feed my sheep,” but He gave him nothing with which to feed them (Jn. 21:17).  The process of being made broken bread and poured-out wine means that you have to be the nourishment for other people’s souls until they learn to feed on God.  They must drain you completely — to the very last drop. 

Have you delivered yourself over to exhaustion because of the way you have been serving God?  If so, then renew and rekindle your desires and affections.  Examine your reasons for service.  Continually look back to the foundation of your love and affection and remember where your Source of power lies.  You have no right to complain, “O Lord, I am so exhausted.”  He saved and sanctified you to exhaust you. 

Be exhausted for God, but remember that He is your supply. 

“All my springs are in you” (Ps. 87:7).

Oswald Chambers, My Utmost For His Highest

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I believe every experience in my life - good and bad, fun or embarassing, planned or surprise, understood or confusing:  sufferings, losses, joys & regrets  - every single season has been allowed by a sovereign God who loves me and desires to use it all for good as I surrender and submit to His will.  Perhaps more importantly for this 2 Much Too Busy series, keeping in mind that every layered experience equips us for service to Christ, and contributes to making us who we are today.  “For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”  Eph. 2:10.  For me, the fruit of a somewhat cooky, unconventional life has meant having an extraordinary ability to be flexible and multi-task.  I used to be bitter about the ridiculous life God gave me, but today Providence is the sweetest pillow I lay my head on at night.  God knew eventually I would have an exceptionally large family by Seattle standards, as well as a huge extended Church family.  Flexibility is essential, and He’s created it to be my middle name.  I like how He’s uniquely created that “in Christ”, in me. 

With this in mind, one of my goals for writing this series was to show another side of the rhetoric of 2 Much Too Busy.  In the course of my Christianity, I’ve been scolded, judged and self-condemning for 2 Much Too Busy.   However, in coming to terms with Providence and His excellence in creating Shelly to be the runner in her unique race, for the most part these days I’m 2 much Too Busy full-time, and guilt-free.  A Scottish pastor provided great insight in reconciling my 2 Much Too Busy realities.  He acknowledged this running around like Martha was part & parcel of life, and further said something shocking that I never forgot:  It is okay to be a Martha - SO LONG AS WE take the heart of Mary along with us.  It’s something I daily, prayerfully practise.

In the must-read Christian classic Pilgrim’s Progress, Christian goes on a journey to the Celestial City (heaven), and 85% of his journey is met with dangers, toils and snares.  Only occasionally is Christian allowed respite from his journey and trials, and he takes full advantage of the rest when it comes.  I think Bunyan and Oswald are on to something.  The more I seek to be used, the more exhausted I become.  This year I committed to some pretty hefty ministry projects the week before Easter.  I didn’t get to bed that entire week before 2 AM, and I had work the next morning.  And every time the temptation to feel guilty came up, something said, “unnecessary”.  And then I read the Oswald Chambers selection I started this post with, and it all fit.  It felt so ”right” to be exhausted for Christ’s sake, the week before his crucifixion.

I don’t have any great wisdom on “How To R&R”, because for the most part, I think we all know how to do that.  And we should.  I have found that Jesus is absolutely trustworthy to provide respite.  He’s always looking out for me.  Sometimes that’s a full-fledged vacation, sometimes it’s a morning down at the beach in silence & solitude, sometimes it’s a catnap at the Columbia Center at lunch, sometimes it’s a delicious Korean dinner and conversation with my blogging buddies, and sometimes it’s a glorious night away downtown with my husband.  I grab it when He brings it, I suck every comfort out I can, and I charge up for my next tour of duty, because He saved and sanctified me to exhaust me.    Adriel’s recent post, 16 Men in My Life, illustrated this point perfectly.  And I’m stealing her equally perfect ending.

Good night.