I must not have been listening very intently to the recent sermon on Humility. Or if I was, I forgot to actually practice humility this week and now I have a dent in my car.

I’m usually such a great parallel-parker. At least I thought I was – which is what got me a little dent. I was so proud of myself the other night when I parallel parked a friend’s huge SUV in an awkward tight spot on a corner in just one try. I was so happy about it that I went and told another friend what a great job I had done and how good it made me feel.

The next day I was paralleling my own small little car, which is something I do often at least daily if not 3 or 4 times a day. When it comes to tight Seattle parking spots, I’m definitely an expert! Which is why I was so surprised that I crunched the side of my car into the bumper of truck as I was speedily, and pridefully, paralleling the day after feeling so great about my skills.

It didn’t take more than a few seconds for me to reflect back on the arrogant attitude I was sporting a day earlier and as I surveyed the minor damage to my car my face was hot with humiliation. I’d like to say here that I believe humility and humiliation are two different things, and truthfully I would much prefer to practice humility than to suffer routine humiliation after being prideful.

And believe me, God will allow us to be humiliated when our prideful attitudes get in the way of practicing humility. A dent in my car? A small thing, yes. An insignificant thing that I will get over.

But a proud attitude? Let’s just say that I’m thankful the only damage was done to my car and not to someone I love. Because usually the consequences of pride are destruction and folly, as this proverb accurately proclaims: “Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.” Proverbs 16:18

 #5: ”How much should I do to attract a guy?  How far is too far?”

You will often be tempted to manipulate circumstances in your search for a spouse. Remember, God is sovereign and you can trust Him with your future.  God is not going to let His best for your life slip through His fingers. Be open and available without being manipulative.   Knowing how far is too far really depends on an active relationship with God.  The temptation will be to seek out community groups or ministry activities solely for the available men involved in the same.  If you are in question about an action or activity, seek God’s face in prayer and in the Word.  From there, listen to your conscience.   If you’re in doubt, then don’t.  Rest, wait, and trust God with the details. 

Psalm 20:7 Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.

Proverbs 19:21 Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.

Romans 14:23 But the man who has doubts is condemned if he eats, because his eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin.

Psalm 40:4 Blessed is the man who makes the LORD his trust, who does not look to the proud, to those who turn aside to false gods.

Administrator’s note: this is “common question/concern #5″ that Deacon Wendy Alsup answers for ladies who are struggling with their singleness. See the “Singleness” category for her article and other questions answered. 

#4: ”There is no way I can be satisfied in this stage of life.”

Godly contentment is possible! At issue is the tension between actively pursuing the God-ordained act of building a home and resting contentedly in this waiting time. God is working good things in your life at this stage. This stage of singleness can be a sweet time of building godly friendships.. It could be a time to minister to others in far away locations. Maybe God has called you to a time-consuming ministry in town you won’t be able to do later when you have a family. Despite His waiting to fulfill your desire to get married, He has prepared works in advance for you that will contribute to a life of abundant joy-even at this stage.

Ephesians 2:10 For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

Philippians 4:11-14 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength. Yet it was good of you to share in my troubles.

I Timothy 6:6-7 But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it.

Psalm 90:14 Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days.

John 15:10-11 If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father’s commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete.

Administrator’s note: this is “common question/concern #4″ that Deacon Wendy Alsup answers for ladies who are struggling with their singleness. See the “Singleness” category for her article and other questions answered. 

So, we have once again entered into the holiday season, my life is. busy. As I’ve sat here trying to think of what to write, as the self protective part of me wants to write something trite and nice, the other fire breathing part of me wont let me.

I’ve been reading Jonah this last week, over and over. And have been thinking over it. Then there is this in verse 2 of Chapter 4 where Jonah is talking to God and says this “That is why I made haste to flee to Tarshish; for I knew that you are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, and relenting from disaster.” Jonah doesn’t want to tell the Ninevehites about God because he knows God’s character. He knows that God will show mercy to them.

I feel like Jonah much more often than I would ever like to admit. I meet people who are horrible, and I think “You are a horrible person” so easily forgetting how horrible I am, and that their horribleness is apparently just easier to see than my own. Thoughts run through my head that somehow they don’t deserve to hear about Jesus, that they don’t deserve forgiveness.

There’s a scene in Great Expectations (I’ve only ever watched the trailer.) where Finn says “Anything, that might be special in me, is you.” And often, that is how I see myself, if I’m being honest. The only thing special or good in me is Jesus.

I’m not very generous when it comes to being merciful. I forget how merciful God has been to me, and I withhold mercy from others. I withhold sharing Jesus with people because of how I feel towards them, and then expect to be shown mercy for my failings. I hope that I am one of the few that identifies all too closely with Jonah, but I have the feeling many do.

Lord, please don’t let me be like Jonah.

Administrator’s note: Wendy wrote In the Waiting, followed today by answer #3 to Common Questions and Concerns. See also: #1 & #2.

IN THE WAITING: Common Questions and Concerns

#3: “Why did God give me a desire that He refuses to fill?”

The desire for a husband and family is certainly God-ordained.  But desires out of line with sufficiency and satisfaction in Christ are devastating.  God often uses unfulfilled desire in Scripture to accomplish His purposes.  Consider Hannah’s classic example.  Without her long unfulfilled desire to have a child, she would never have been willing to give her son up to service in God’s temple.  No one can say for sure why God is allowing this unfulfilled desire in your heart.  But you can trust that it is consistent with His character and that He is working in your desires to accomplish His will.  Psalms 37 speaks of God’s working in and through our desires.  But consider the context.  The general exhortation of the chapter is to be patient and not worry when evil people seem to be winning and your desires are slow to be fulfilled. 

Psalms 37:3-5, 7 Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD ; trust in him and he will do this: … Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him;

Isaiah 30:15 This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says: “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it.

Administrator’s note: Wendy is answering 10 Common Concerns and Questions of Christian ladies struggling with singleness. See her article, In the Waiting, and Question #1.

IN THE WAITING: Common Questions and Concerns

 #2: “God isn’t good, and He isn’t working for my good.”

Oh, but He is!!!!  God is notorious for using the worst of circumstances to work the best of things in His children’s lives.  This is His trademark.  Think of Job, Joseph, Hannah, Ruth, etc.  He brings hard circumstances into our lives, forcing us to lose our life so that we may truly find it.  Then He teaches us the meaning of true abundant living.  Dying to ourselves is painful.  But believe that the work He is performing in your life defies expectation. 

Ephesians 3:20-21 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

Romans 8:28-32 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified. What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all–how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?

Hebrews 11:1, 6  Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. …And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.

Matthew 10:37-39 “Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; and anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.

 Administrator’s note: Deacon Wendy Alsup posted In the Waiting addressing a Christian woman’s struggle with singleness. Now she tackles 10 Common Questions and Concerns over 10 posts.

IN THE WAITING: Common Questions and Concerns

#1: “I prayed and prayed, but God still hasn’t brought someone into my life.  I’m afraid God’s answer will be NO.”

God invites perseverance in prayer.  The parable of the unjust judge in Luke 18 was given to us for the express purpose to teach us to not give up in prayer.  Though God is sovereign over this process and has before the foundation of the world established His plan for our lives, He still invites us to nag Him in prayer.  And in that persevering prayer, He promises a peace over our hearts and minds that will transcend our ability to understand.  What a gracious God!

Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Luke 18:1-8 Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. He said: “In a certain town there was a judge who neither feared God nor cared about men. And there was a widow in that town who kept coming to him with the plea, ‘Grant me justice against my adversary.’
“For some time he refused. But finally he said to himself, ‘Even though I don’t fear God or care about men, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will see that she gets justice, so that she won’t eventually wear me out with her coming!’ ”
And the Lord said, “Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on the earth?”

Romans 8:26 In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.

Isaiah 30:18 (ESV) Therefore the LORD waits to be gracious to you, and therefore he exalts himself to show mercy to you. For the LORD is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for him.

You are a single woman at Mars Hill. You value marriage and children and long to be a godly wife and mother. However, God has not yet fulfilled these desires in your life. Married or single, unfulfilled desire is a lifelong problem. Sometimes we desire things in opposition to God. Dealing with those types of sinful desires is hard, but it pales in comparison to the struggle of dealing with God-given desires that remain unfulfilled. Why would God impress on our hearts the value and worth of a God-centered marriage without also fulfilling that desire by giving us a God-honoring spouse? What should Christian singles do with this unfulfilled desire? What do you do in the waiting?

(more…)

The holidays are here, and along with the sparkles and joy and good will, there will also be the truly offensive:  Short tempers, shopping lines, parking hassles, sandpaper family relationships.  Time to consciously prepare for acts of mercy.  My jury stint a few Novembers back turned out to be a fabulous gift from God, even though it had one helluvan offensive sting.  I hope I never forget it. (more…)

Humble Pie:

Perhaps the most repugnant food known to mankind, humble pie is usually served on what the recipient sees as an incredibly unappealing dish. Humble Pie is the another one of those “old wives’ cures for nasty vices such as pride, arrogance, and in general thinking better of yourself than you ought. Humble pie is usually eaten when the eater has no taste for it. Humble pie has a way of purging your system in a rather. unpleasant way.

Welcome November. November has brought me some humble pie. It wasn’t said in a harsh way, but in a comment from a friend that felt akin to being slapped with 20 grit sandpaper by a Grizzly bear. It is. tiring. Judging by Shelly’s recent blog this isn’t a limited feeling going around.

I’ve felt a little like a zombie lately, school, work, homework, unfulfilling times of reading the Word. Until of course I asked God to humble me and boil out my impurities, show me the sin in my life that I don’t see or don’t want to see. Amazing how quickly He answers questions like that.

By the time this is published I will have escaped to Cannon Beach, Oregon, for a weekend. I can only assume that He will dish me up some more pie over the trip, and while I hate the taste of it I couldn’t ask for anything better. Jesus is amazing.

A lot of different questions have been running through my mind, and no matter what they are the answer continues to be the same Jesus is faithful and amazing. His best is always best, as is His timing.

Psalm 62:5-8
For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence,
for my hope is from him.
 He only is my rock and my salvation,
my fortress; I shall not be shaken.
On God rests my salvation and my glory;
my mighty rock, my refuge is God.
Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your heart before him;
God is a refuge for us.