Life on Mars ContentCommunity: The Un-safest Place
Should community be a safe place?
I often hear it said that to have a healthy growing community groups ministry, the groups must be a safe place for believer and non-believer alike. And to this point I agree, that the community of God should be a place that is welcoming to all comers, hospitable and loving. and in that sense very safe.
But what are people really saying when they say they want their community to be safe?
I fear that many equate safety with comfort. Defining a safe group as one where I can be myself.not judged but excepted as I am, “judge not, lest ye be judged”.right?
Sounds great. but wait. what if “myself” is a gossip. or a liar, or ungrateful, or self worshiping. Should a Community Group be a place where I am free to be those things in a safe environment? Have we not been called to spur one another on to good deeds. to encourage and rebuke one another so that we glorify Jesus with this fleeting life? (Hebrews 3:12-14)
My wife and I experience this as we prepared to go through the HPC curriculum with another couple. We experience some trepidation as we prepared to expose ourselves in that community. Our fear was not because we did not trust or loving friends. It was because, in that community, we could guarantee discomfort from the exposure of our sin. Should we have dismissed this community because it was un-safe?
If safety is comfort then I pray our groups are never safe. To be comfortable with your sin is to be dead to the work of the Holy Spirit (John 16:7-9). In authentic community, I cannot hide my sin for long because, inevitably, pressure and time will expose it among a group of people who truly care and love me. In such a community, I am forced to confront, confess and repent of my sin. This is painful, unsettling, and certainly not safe by the standard of comfort. Safety is not in that I will not be challenged to live a life worthy of my calling to Christ, but it is in that it will be done in love from a brother or sister that is, or has, walked through that same fire. Ultimately, there is no safer place then in the arms of Christ, to whom this process points and draws us.
Considering the non-believer, it is unfathomable to me that we can believe it is safer to be left in a state of death and decay, dangling over the flames of hell, then to be confronted with the life-giving message of the Gospel. This is rarely a comfortable confrontation with the living the God, but how desperate is their need to be saved from the destruction they are hurtling toward. Yet we hold our tongue for comfort? Unfortunately we are often deceived that what would be safe (God) is dangerous (uncomfortable) and that which is dangerous (damnation) is safe (comfortable). (Isa. 5:20).
My encouragement to you is to embrace the danger of living in authentic community. Look forward to the work God is doing in you and through you as part of a community. Embraced discomfort for a greater joy, Sanctification.
My prayer is that groups will be a place where we encounter God, and challenge one another to glorify Him. That’s not safe. That’s community.
Great post brad — many thanks.
Word. As a community group leader I get to decide just how safe and comfortable our group is. It’s really tempting to create an environment that discusses comfortable ideas of theology rather than the sin exposure and heart change theology requires. Sometimes I think that too much discomfort in a group will scare people away. Then I look at the history of MH church and remember that I was drawn to MH because it made me uncomfortable with sin and with myself. I remember that really we all desire heart change, so that even if we don’t admit it, we like the good medicine of discomfort. It brings us closer to Jesus.
Brad - A huge AMEN to your post.
I think it was Benjamin Franklin who said, “Those who exchange liberty for safety deserve neither.” Granted, he was expressing a political opinion, but it applies to the Christian as well. As we who have been given liberty in Christ, it is incumbent on us to not exchange it for cheap “safety.” All too often, what I experience in the world - as well as in myself - is a desire to be comfortable/safe. The outward expressions of this can be benign, or horribly sinful, and selfish in the extreme. I echo Scott in saying that part of what drew me and kept me at Mars Hill was being exposed as an undisciplined poseur, and as one of the Pastors pointed out to me, full of “way too much pride.” Faithful are the wounds of a friend, right?
I appreciate your call to confront ourselves and each other, in and with love, that our sin be exposed and Christ glorified. James, Peter and Paul mention often enough that we are to call our Brothers and Sisters on their sin, being mindful of our own; that together we can give one another a leg-up on the “sin that so easily ensnares us.” In being willing to lose our relationships by speaking truth, we actually strengthen them. Go figure…
It isn’t often easy to see myself in the light of my sin, but I am grateful to receive the loving correction that is available in community.
Well said Brad.
Reminds me of this verse from Hebrews 12:11:
No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
The Apostle Paul saw Christian community as the best environment for disciples to be shaped in the likeness of Christ. Being shaped in any different form sounds uncomfortable. But that is our call as followers of Jesus and the discipline of community life is one of the tools used by the Master Carpenter. We offer other tools along these lines at http://www.livingforgod.net Thank you for your message.
At His Mercy,
Calvin Wulf
http://www.livingforgod.net
Thanks for the encouragement Brad. Jesus wants to see us out of our comfort zones. He can only truly use us when we swim away from the lifeboat into the great unknown depths of the sea. That is where we are no longer in control and can only seek guidance from Him.